Photographer Christina Maradiaga’s Is This It For Us? is a meditation on the idiosyncrasies of love during a global pandemic. His photos of familiar objects and intimate spaces try to make sense of our connections and relationships in a world where seemingly nothing and everything has changed. This short series captures our collective voyeuristic experience, as we follow our lives like statistics; watching its waves, love and life’s unravelling, and its inevitable coming back together–on hold, yet ever-changing in its stasis.
Read the full interview between Alexa Fahlman and Christian below.

What’s your living situation like at the moment?

At the moment, I'm holed up in my apartment by myself. My partner lives with me, but she's currently away to be with her parents to both finish her summer semester, and take care of herself physically and mentally. As cliché as it sounds, this virus had led us to care more about our bodies our mental health, and study ourselves to figure out what's working, what's not working, how we can improve ourselves, etc. Though I'm supporting her decision, I've been feeling quite lonely, so I've been reaching out to my parents more to chat and check in.

A lot of us have been experiencing this sense of “enforced togetherness”, how has that affected you on an individual level, and have you noticed these effects bleed into your relationship?

Honestly, we both have noticed this. We've both mentioned how difficult it can be spending so much time together, to the point where you'll begin to get angry or upset at the littlest things. For instance, I'm one that's all about cleanliness, so I did get angry a few times after noticing that she's cut her hair and left trails of hair all throughout the apartment, or when the bedroom is a mess. Before, I'd be working at the office and she'd be in school, so we'd have that space between us that allowed us to breathe, and live as individuals. We would send each other memes throughout the day, but every couple does that!

Enforced togetherness scares me in a way? Just feels like someone's got a magnifying glass and is zooming in on all of your pores/black spots on your face.

You talk about sensitive spots, I think we’ve all been noticing those in ourselves and our partners…can you speak more on this?

Well, when you're spending so much time together, you'll begin to notice little things that make you go "oh, that's interesting." Something you either haven't noticed before, or didn't want to notice, but now it's there in your head. However, I think the main thing we're wanting to know is if we're right for each other, if it's too early to begin settling down, and I personally don't want to be a distraction for her while she's in school. She's an incredible woman, incredibly hard-working, but it's difficult to juggle school, work, a relationship, and taking care of yourself. Sometimes you've got to remove one of the many things you love, permanently or temporarily, and at times it may be the relationship that you love dearly.

Now, in our case, we're not ending the relationship, but we're wondering if we should leave it on pause.

Do you think we expect too much of modern relationships? While we all can attest to there being no such thing as the “perfect person”, we still seem to expect our partner to be our best friend, lover, caregiver, therapist even…

At the end of the day, if you and your partner are comfortable and happy being all of those things for each other, then go for it. For me, personally, I do think we expect too much from modern relationships. Whether it's asking for constant attention (digitally or in-person), expecting them to take care of you even when they've got their own shit they're going through - whatever it may be, I do believe we should begin to relax more, and just enjoy the feeling of being in love, but also begin loving yourself. Rather than constantly seeking attention, or getting angry because they haven't replied to your mass text message spree, maybe start cooking for yourself, or work on that project you've been setting aside for months. We've been looking, looking, looking for years, thinking that you'll be taken care of by your partner and won't need to worry anymore, but that's just wrong. Stop the search, and start working on becoming the best version of yourself. Wow, this sounds like one of those seminars you go to for $50.

While your partner leaves to spend time with her family- what are your plans?

I've been wanting to release a couple of short films for years now, and I'm finally beginning to write the dialogue for it, along with storyboarding. Mostly inspired by the French New Wave style of cinema, but I've been listening to My Bloody Valentine a lot recently, and have wanted to create a piece you can watch while listening to their album Loveless. Health and fitness have become quite important for me now, so I'm trying to better myself physically. You know, get that summer bod for 2021.

Has this pandemic expanded your view of yourself and how you love, or want to be loved?

Definitely. I've started caring about my physical health, caring about the future and how I'd like it to turn out, but I've also been more aware of what I look for, what makes me happy, and how to be happy. As for how I love, I do believe there's work to be done? I'm someone who quickly falls deeply, deeply in love, and it's hurt me in the past, but I believe this time it's for real. You can't help but think about the things that soured your previous relationships when you're so in love, and with this extra personal time I have, I'll begin to feel anxious that I may be failing in some parts, or that she'll find something off about me and leave me.

Some have said that this pandemic has become a source of reparative connection, do you feel similarly or has it had the opposite effect for you?

I believe it has become a source of reparative connection, and I think the hurdles we've been going through recently are signs that our relationship is evolving into something bigger, something deeper. Though I'll feel anxious and scared at times, inside, I know this will lead us to a more evolved, and happier stage. No one knows for sure, but that's life.

Christian on Instagram